Life, Spiritual Walk, Writing

Stuck in the Circle

It’s taken me two months to write this post, and I’ll tell you why: I have been stuck in the lies and circle of self-doubt and comparison. If you’re being honest with yourself, you may know exactly what I’m talking about.

I started this blog with a clear message from God–words like “safe space,” counseling, young women, and love all came at a moment of complete clarity where I knew this was a project He wanted me to invest in. It’s been almost one year since I heard that message while chatting with one of the special guests at a media conference I attended for work. The conference was supposed to be a learning experience for my social media position, but ended up speaking specifically to me about my place as a writer.

But once I started, fear set in. Who am I to say I am a writer when everything I’ve submitted this past year has been rejected? Who am I to say I’m a writer when I let so much time pass between blog posts? Who am I to say I’m a writer when the only steady gig I’ve had has been the Young Salvationist magazine, which still has connotations of being a “lame” teen magazine that The Salvation Army is “required” to publish.

Continue reading “Stuck in the Circle”

Life, Spiritual Walk, Writing

After “Wait and See”

“So do not be afraid. I am with you. Do not be terrified. I am your God. I will make you strong and help you. My powerful right hand will take good care of you. I will always do what is right.” –Isaiah 41:10 (NIRV)

So, it’s been a few days, and I completed the “Wait and See” reading plan that I spoke about in a previous blog post. To say that God answered my prayers in the time we spent together during this devotional almost seems to make light of the time we spent together. I have no doubt of the things He told me, and know exactly how to proceed in the matter that I took to Him in prayer. I can’t say that I have ever felt so strongly about knowing the course of action that God has wanted me to take, and it has taken a huge weight off of my mind. Was this outcome based on the reading plan I chose? Not at all. God knew that my heart was truly searching his will in this matter, and I know He used this plan to help speak to me.

Continue reading “After “Wait and See””

Books/Entertainment, Writing

Book Review: “On Writing” by Stephen King

A few months ago, I started feeling more and more like I was throwing away my college degree. Now, it’s not that I don’t use that knowledge every day–someone who can write and edit well is always appreciated–but I spent my college days writing stories and poems, and since that time nearly 5 years ago, I haven’t put the time or the effort into the thing I claim to love most.

I think I really started to take this seriously because, 1) I’m now published once a month in the Young Salvationist, and 2) I just turned 25 and feel like I don’t have anything to show for it. Yes, you could say, “But Rachael, 25-year-olds aren’t supposed to have anything to show for in life.” But I can’t help but disagree in my soul. As much as I love having the YS credit to my writing career, I’m feeling greedy, and I want more.

Continue reading “Book Review: “On Writing” by Stephen King”

Life, Spiritual Walk, Writing

My Dreams, God’s Plan

“We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.” (Proverbs 16:9 NLT)

Dear Friend,

Today I am once again struggling with what to write for my monthly column for the Young Salvationist Magazine. This is not a rare occurrence for me, unfortunately, but a monthly ritual. After my column for the month previous has been turned in on the first (really more like the 7th though), I start looking at the topic due for the next month.

That’s usually when I realize I have no idea what I want to say.

Continue reading “My Dreams, God’s Plan”

Life, Writing

Happy Birthday to Me!

Dear Friend,

I feel like it has been forever since I’ve been able to sit down to write. In reality, it’s only been 2 weeks, but these weeks have flown by. All I can say is that the huge event at work that our department has spent over a year planning was this past weekend. It was intense–every day felt like 2 or 3 days smashed together, with only a few hours of sleep between them. But I am finally home, have had a couple days to rest, and had a lovely celebration of my birthday.

As I turn 25 years old today, I’m feeling a bit introspective about my life. Honestly, I’ve spent a few days feeling this way and thinking about how my life has changed in only a few years. Five years ago when I entered my 20’s, I was a senior in college, dating my now-husband for a little over a year, and I had no idea of where my life would lead. Honestly, it’s a testament to God’s faithfulness that I am where I am today with a loving husband and a job that I enjoy.

Continue reading “Happy Birthday to Me!”